Firstly, can I really help you?
Or am I just trying to take your money?
I'm sure you're expecting me to answer, 'yes' and 'no' to those questions and go on to explain exactly how I can help you and why I'm not just trying to take you're money and blah, blah, blah.
But, if I did that, I'd be bullshitting you.
The reality is, I CAN'T HELP YOU.
And yes, I AM TRYING TO TAKE YOUR MONEY.
I can't lift the weights for you
I can't run those km's for you
I won't cook and prepare your food for you
I won't turn your phone off at night for you
I won't get you out of bed each morning
I won't pump you up for each session
And I sure as shit won't be there 24/7 for support, because we all know that's bullshit. I've got to sleep and live my life too.
So, now you know what I can't and won't do (actually you probably already knew all that from all the other trainers you've had who didn't do those things either)
So now you ask
well, what the fuck can you do smart arse
And, more to the point, what am I willing to do and probably most importantly right now, why should you even keep reading.
Chances are, if weren't offended in the first few lines, you and me aren't so different.
You probably value the truth and don't want someone to micro-manage trying to motivate you your every waking moment.
You already have some initiative and desire, but maybe aren't sure about the best way to go about things.
And maybe you occasionally don't follow through the way you know you can and should.
I don't know how you act actually, I'm just guessing.
But if that is somewhat like you, because that was me, then here's the truth about how I'll actually help you, and let me preface this list by being honest up front.
There is absolutely NOTHING impressive about what I offer.
👎 I don't offer fancy training programs.
✔ I've done the same 10-20 exercises for 5 years and so do 90% of my clients
(chances are you have 2 arms and 2 legs like I do too and will probably do the same)
👎 I don't offer 'personalised' meal plans
✔ It's not my job to figure out what you like to eat. It's my job to give you plenty of FDN choices (fast, delicious, nutritious). Yes, it's corny. No, I don't give a fuck. Yes, it works.
👎 I don't text you every day asking how your day went to 'check-in' 🤮
✔ I call you once a week for 10-15 minutes.
We look at the data.
How many sessions did you complete?
Which sessions and exercises went well?
Which exercises did you struggle with?
How many meals did you prepare?
How many meals helped you progress?
How many didn't?
Did you to bed early enough?
How were your energy levels?
Did your boss give you a boat load of work and piss you the fuck off and that's why it was a shit week, or did you hit the snooze button every morning and it was your fault?
What are you going to do this week?
We repeat this process each week until you get the result you want.
Then, we sit down and you tell me whether you want to set another goal, or you tell me to fuck off you're sick of giving me your money.
Either way, I'll genuinely be happy.
As much as I want to take your money, I honestly would much rather live in a world where we didn't need personal trainers and dieticians.
But the reality is we do and my goal is simply to help more people get to the point where I feel as though myself and my clients are at, and that is;
✔ You are confident going to the gym, knowing what to do and how to do it
✔ You are lifting and moving safely
✔ You are lifting and moving effectively
✔ You know how to get the result you want
✔ You know how to make food you enjoy and want to eat
✔ You know how to make that food quickly and conveniently
✔ You know how to make that tasty and easy to make food help you get leaner, stronger, faster and create more energy so, you know, you can enjoy your life
✔ You know what to focus on when the going gets tough
✔ You trust yourself to do the right thing even when you don't have the motivation
✔ And most of all, you realise that it's your life and you're in control of it.
Sure, there are some things you can't control like the weather, if people like you or not, if you get cancer, if others treat you poorly and so on.
But, you begin to realise that you are always in control of how you respond to these external events.
You are always in control of what you focus on, the meaning you give it and ultimately, what you do about it.
You are always in control of how you move your body, what you put in your mouth, when you get up and so on.
You become greater than the problem.
If it sounds like I'm trying to pump you up, read it again, but calmly. I'm only reminding you of what you already know and is true.
So getting back to what I said...
I want to take your money and I can't really help you all that much.
But I can guarantee this
✔ I will always tell you the truth
✔ I do genuinely give a shit
✔ I want to see you what you want and actually know how to help you do that
(If I don't know how to, I will tell you and refer you to someone who does. No BS.)
So here's a few testimonies below to prove that I don't just write good copy, I'm a much better trainer.